Trusting

Loosing, gaining....two verbs used with the word trust. And, they can be used at the same time -maybe the subject changes. In every moment of the day I am loosing trust or someone is loosing my trust. I am gaining trust or someone is gaining my trust. We are trying to teach our kids about trust. I always think of it as they need to gain our trust. I realized this morning that they need to gain my trust too. Somewhere between infancy and 9,8,6 years of age there has been some trust lost. I realize that I need to work at regaining the trust - the trust of total security; the trust of love and acceptance no matter what they do or say; the trust of being able to tell me anything at anytime.

God doesn't need to earn my trust - it is His by rightful design. I on the other hand just need to see and accept it. It is there for my taking. The trust that I have total security in Him; the trust that He loves and accepts me no matter what I do or say; the trust of being able to tell Him anything at anytime.

Heavenly Father, I thank you for your great and glorious gift of trust. May I guard and cherish and use this gift to the full capacity that you intended when you gave it to me.

Processing

The past 6 months have been a roller coaster for me as I have been standing silent. Is that an oxi-moran? I am not sure one stands silent as they are on a roller coaster. Maybe more like sitting screaming. I think maybe - MAYBE - the roller coaster is coming to and end - and I am ready to get off. This past month has been the most growth/healing that I think I have ever experienced. Growth and healing don't come cheap or easy. It's actually very costly and very painful. But OH, the joy that comes with the sweet sweet dawning of a beautiful clear blue sunny day! I anticipate many posts to come out of this past month. This blog will more than not become my processing of this moth. I am excited to see what God is going to do with my silent standing (or is it my sitting screams?!?!).